Here I am!
In mid December, I hit a wall in life. I was burned out. Busted. I couldn’t get it together. I kept trying. It was awful. I was fighting my spiral down with everything in me, but I just couldn’t figure out a way out of it. So… I quit. Yep, I quit homeschooling. Ugh. I put my children back into public school, and I cried. I cried because I hated it. I cried because I missed them. I cried because I didn’t miss them. I cried because my identity was changing. I cried because I absolutely hate everything that public school stands for. Then I cried because my husband wouldn’t let me change my mind. It’s been a mess. We did take our oldest daughter out of the middle school she was in, and put her back home with me. My other three at this time are not coming home until the end of the semester. Holding on through this semester is AWFUL!!!! For me and the kids!!! But I have chosen to honor my husband, even though I disagree very strongly.
I do not like public schools. I like some teachers, but I believe good teachers are bound up by laws and regulations. I hate the hierarchy that says that teachers know what is best for my children above what I know. I have to request permission for my children to not participate in gym class when they have a cough. Or request that they not see a movie. etc. What? No, schools should answer to parents. They work for us. I shouldn’t have to explain to the school why I the parent decided my kids are too sick for school and fear the dreaded truancy call. That’s stupid.
What I have realized is that my strong opinions offend other parents because they have chosen the opposite. They think I am wrong…. and I feel strongly for my own family what is right. I wish I would of held onto this in December when I was falling apart.
Also, in the last couple months, my family has been sick over and over again. Right now I think we have the flu. It’s awful and I can’t wait to be over it. It resulted in a double ear infection in my sweet 4 year old. Praying we get over this quickly…..
Thanks for listening to me!